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Mr.No-Commitment-Again

Psst!! I had a date with Mr.No-Commitment last friday. It was supposed to have been saturday night, but he text somewhere in the middle of the week to say he's got some family thing on saturday night (my close friend Lisa said, 'yeah right,' to that) but atleast he gave an alternative date which fell on friday. I'd rather have that than having him cancel the date anyway. So, I was really excited on thursday, picking out like ten different things to wear to work. It had to look good as I was meeting him straight after work. Should I wear black, brown, white or multi-coloured? I settled for turquoise and brown. I woke up early on friday morning and took my time dressing up. I always have this feeling of excitement when I meet Mr.No-Commitment. Suffice to say, I couldnt wait for the day to end, so that I could rush to MidValley for dinner and perhaps, movie. We had planned to watch Transformers a couple of months back but unfortunately, it was going to premiere only next wednesday and there wasn't much choice for an interesting movie.

So work was painfully long and never-ending. My boss kept asking me to do this and that. He had a tendency to ask for things when I am about to leave so I was keeping my fingers crossed that he won't resort to it that Friday. Anyway, 6pm finally came. Yeah, as usual, my boss asked for something at the thirteenth hour. I glared at him and pursed my lips. He knew I had a date with Mr. No-Commitment that night. He smiled sheepishly. 'Sorry ah', and he even had the nerve to wink at me!

So anyway, I got it done and off I went to Midvalley. As usual, as I got nearer, my heart will start pounding nervously. Oh God, what do I do today? Should I make him hold my hands in the cinema if we end up wtching a movie? Should I kiss him? How do I do it? Where? I felt like a criminal, plotting something in my mind.

Just as I got there, he calls and says he'll be a bit late as he is just leaving the office and he told me to go 'window shopping'. So window shopping I went, trying out clothes, shoes, handbags and perfumes. Half an hour later he calls and asks, 'Hey babe, where are you?' Oooo...'babe' I felt excited by that change in how he calls me. My cheeks started to burn and I got butterflies in my stomach. Sigh....

He hugged and kissed me tenderly on both cheeks (heheheheh) when he saw me. I liked the way he touched the small of my back when he pulled me near. So we started talking and talking. See, that's the thing with Mr. No-Commitment. We can talk for hours and I don't have to be afraid that I'll be out of topic. There is never a moment of silence. And this has nothing to do with the fact that I talk a lot too okay. He picked the restaurant this time. He said if he left it to me, we'll end up in Chili's. So we ended up in Little Penang Cafe. We had kuay teow, kerabu and otak-otak. As usual, when I talk, he listens, nods, smiles and make the right sounds at every few minutes. I love this.

We sat there talking till everyone left and the restaurant about to close. Then we adjourned to, yeah you guessed it, Chili's for margharitas. He had Presidente and I had El Nino, which was heaven!! So off course after a few drinks, we laughed easier. Our hands brushed together at different intervals, courtesy of my criminal mind plotting on the way there. At one point he was quite sweet. I was telling him about how I have to go for grooming classes. I have to wear suits to work and I'll either have to wear my hair up in a bun or cut it short. And he looked at me, and said 'Wear your hair in a bun, don't cut it. I like how it falls on your shoulders like that...' I had to restrain myself from jumping up and down. I told myself to breath in and out. But All that came out was an excited smile. And I started touching my hair self-consciously.

Finally it was time to leave. I had to work the next day and he had golf classes. As usual, he walked me back to my car. In my tipsiness, I forgot where I parked it. So we were practically going around in circles, looking for my car. My criminal, plotting mind made me hold on to his hands as walked the parking lot. I had to get some cheap thrill before I left so if it had to boil down to hand-holding than it had to boil down to hand holding. I can't kiss him in the parking lot in full view of others can I? Anyway, he held my hands tight because I was giggling a bit too much. I tell you, if only my friends were there to watch the entire thing, they'd die of laughter lah!

I was never more unhappy to see my car. He found it all too soon. But he took my car keys from me, opened the door and asked repeatedly if I was okay to drive home. I said, 'Yes' and giggled. He cast a worried look at me and started my car for me. 'Call me if you loose your way or once you get home (I have accidently taken wrong turnings home before). Call me if anything okay?' and kiss my right cheek. I smiled like a lovesick teenager and waved my hands gingerly. He smiled and watched me reverse. Once he was sure I could get out of the parking space safely, he walked back into the shopping mall to go to his car.

He called when I was on the way to check if I was okay. How sweet. See? Now you guys know why I like him right? He's nice. He listens when I talk and he doesnt take advantage of me. And, he sents me back to my car. Sayang Mr. No-Commitment!

Miss-Make-A-Fool_Out-Of-Myself!

I am often like Miss-Make-A-Fool-Out-Of-Myself. Some of my friends have had laughing fits at my expense. Remember Mr.Boobies? Yeah. So recently as everyone already know, I started my new job in a totally whole new environment. Where I used to work, whatever I did on a daily basis does not really allow me to interact with my boss but, It's totally different here. As secretary, I'm supposed to know everything at the back of my hands and ready to jump to do anything asked by my boss, the General Manager. So in the first week that I started, my boss wanted to know which phone number belongs to which phone in the office and he wanted me to have one phone to myself. There were three all together. So he asked me to dial my own mobile number and see which number appears from which phone on the screen of my mobile. In my state of blur-ness, I kept on dialing and dialing a different number, because I was nervous. Sweat started trickling down my back. Then when I finally resigned to the fact that I couldn't get through my number I panicked and asked my boss my number. How silly! Why would he know my number at the back of his head? Needless to say, he looked at me blankly , not to mention oddly, and said, 'huh?' before going back to his work. I felt really silly at that point. Only then my number came flooding back to me. I was perplexed and felt sheepish at the same time. I could only guess what my boss was thinking at that point of time. What kind of silly girl is this to forget her own mobile number? And will she be able to do what I expect of her? God!! I irritate myself! I could just imagine that if my friends from Astro were there, they'd probably have a field day! Well, I'm glad to be of help, even if it means making a clown out of myself. Here's to my friends from Astro, Cheers!

Mr.Want-To-Get-Married

Recently, Mr.Want-To-Get-Married asked me out on a date. I have only gone out on one date with this guy and we hardly know each other, except for the daily exhange of emails and text messages. Then one day he pops THE question. Through e-mail. He asked me to marry him. Okay. Anyone who knows me really well would know within a second that I wasn't even flattered or moved by it. And it isn't even because I don't want to get hitched again so fast either. This guy is a a bigtime flirt. If I was 20 and he said that to me, yeah, I'd probably fall for him and end up in undisclosed places with him. Unfortunately for him, and fortunately for me, I am close to thirty two and have had more than my share of experiences with lazy words and loose tongues of men who seem to think that these are magic words a.k.a 'Open Sesame!' Well, suffice to say, this 'sesame' ain't gonna open up at the seemingly insincere but otherwise flattering words.

Apparently this guy goes after anything running around in skirts. I'd guess that even a cow dressed up in skirt and pantyhose would appeal to him. When Mr.Want-To-Get-Married popped the question I actually wounded his pride by laughing out loud. I asked him, WHY? Why does he want to marry me and what on earth makes him think that I want to be married?

Answer: He said because I'm a nice person, which made me laugh even further. Excuse the pun, but I don't normally laugh at people but this was totally hilarious. I know I wasn't even remotely nice to him. After he showed up on our date in slippers, I decided that I don't have to sell myself short and settle for this kind of thing. I mean, If I can dress up well to meet someone, why can't someone do the same? vice versa? Is is because they think I'm a divorcee so they don't have to try so hard. Divorcees will fall for any guy right? Wrong. Okay, let's not get too intense. I'll just give all guys the benefit of the doubt.Which means, they treat all women the same, divorced or not. Then he said I'm pretty. So I said, 'Yeah, I know'. Haha. I can be a jerk at times you know. Yeah, another bad trait. But before you judge me let me explain why I become a jerk. Sometimes when I go out with a guy and after that date I realize that I'm just not that into him (maybe because he came on too strong), I do things like that. If they compliment me, I say 'Yeah I know' in hopes that they think I'm a perasan case and stop calling and texting me. This has worked for me in some cases but in this case, it hasn't. And I don't know how to stop it. This guy just keeps trying his luck.

I rely on my instincts a lot these days. And my instincts tell me Mr.Want-To-Get-Married just wants to get into my pants. So I'll be a jerk for as long as I want to. Want to get married! Arghh!! I have two kids for heaven's sakes! Do the guy even realize what kind of responsibility he has to uphold if he wants to marry me? I don't think so. So meanwhile, I have to sabotage myself by pretending to be someone I'm not just so as not to fan his crazy marriage ideas

About Middle Fingers And Creeps

Malaysians are supposed to be warm, friendly people right? Yeah right!. Forgive me for being a pessimist here a bit but I seriously think these days people are getting to be tad more discourteous than before. Maybe it's the ailing economy. Yeah, let's blame it on the economy. People are moody and get defensive when they think they are being attacked (whatever). It all started out one fine Monday morning...I guess Monday morning blues really get to people. I mean, there I was driving to work, in my own lane, listening to my daily dose of the mix Fm breakfast show, when an ass just cuts in front of my car without signaling. Seriously, signals, side mirrors or rear-view mirrors are there for a reason, not for show. And It wasn't any Kelisa or Kancil, mind you, this was a big ten-seater passenger van. I got a shock and almost swerved into another vehicle in the right lane, in a suit to protect myself and my car. But the second vehicle, who had no idea what had happened seconds before, honked at me and showed me the middle finger. I was shocked and dazed. And what's with the middle finger thing?

A couple of months ago, I was on the way to work along the busy Bukit Jalil stretch, a Kelisa was trying to get in between the cars in a jam packed, two-car lane. The dude seriously thought he could squeeze his way through. Who did he think he was? Bloody f*****g Knight Rider? Seriously. What happened next was inevitable. I could see it coming and frustratingly, I couldn't stop it. The right lane my car was in wasn't even moving and the guy was in the left lane, squeezing his way through. He came straight for my car and knocked my left passenger side mirror. I could only watch in horror as my side mirror came out of its sockets and dangled out. My instant reaction was giving him a loud honk, because that was the only thing I could do. And The guy just turns at me and gave me the middle finger. What an ass! And because of him, I have my rear-view mirror in bandages and everytime I am stuck in traffic, people look at my bandaged side mirror and shake their heads and try their best to take a peek at yours truly. They are probably thinking what a terrible driver I am!.

In another incident, I was driving and looking for a parking space in Bangsar when I entered the lane next to McDonald's. It was after work rush hour and practically everyone was rushing to get a spot to park. So there I was waiting for my turn to turn right back into the main road. There's is an unspoken rule when you drive in a jam that you take turns to get into that road. One car from that lane, one car from this lane. So the other car from the next lane just passed through and next should be my turn. But suddenly, another car from the next lane rushes into the lane that I was going to turn into, honked at me and, yeah, you guessed it, gave me the middle finger! It was a good-looking guy by the way. But a creep all the same.

Really, I think Malaysians are becoming so intense, especially where driving is concerned. People jump cues at traffic lights. People cut into a lane without signaling. They race their silly-reconstructed cars on the highways and endanger the lives of others. Really, and we all wonder why accidents happen. And what is it with the middle-finger-happy spree? As a person who happens to be the object of this abominable gesture, and traumatized by it nevertheless, I would like to say to those people who finds solace in this uncivilized gesture to grow up and get a life!! But maybe I should not take it so personally since they feel better after the deed. Well, do whatever that makes you sleep at night creep!

Don't Allow The Grass To Grow On The Path of Friendship

"One who looks for friends without faults will never find one" is an old Hasidic (ancient jew, although there are modern hasidics now) saying. This proverb is interesting and quite profound.I fell for it immediately. If a person is searching for the perfect friendship, well, sorry to say, but there isn't really one. I mean, it doesn't exist. Perfect friendships, if there are any, can only be superficial and clearly sits on the surface. If you like to be in a dreamworld where your friends are there to only say good things to you, to fan your idiosyncracies and tell you its okay to do this and to do that when its not, then chances are you won't be in a very satisfied relationship with them. Homer, author of 'The Illiad', the epic story of Troy, said 'A sympathethic friend can be quite as dear as a bother'. This is true. Some friends are so close, they can be passed of unofficially as your sibling. There is nothing like having that kind of friend when you are in trouble, especially when you find it difficult to open your mouth to your actual relative or siblings. I believe, the friends we have around us, not the social butterfly ones, mind you, where they are only there fleetingly and seem to fly off every now and then, but those really close ones you can count on, exist in your life for different reasons. You connect with one friend on one level concerning an issue and its something you see eye to eye with. With another friend, you do agree on a different issue and at the same time you might even disagree with the first friend on this issue. Its nothing to do with your love or friendship with one another when you disagree on an issue. Its just a personal preference. It does not mean that when you are friends, you have to agree on every single issue all the time. If you want friends that agree with you always, then maybe they are not someone you really feel comfortable with, and maybe its time to re-evaluate your feelings and what is it exactly you want out of a friendship. If you have an uncomfortable relationship with someone, you will feel the reluctance to say something in your own opinion or to avoid being too forward with that person. I like to have someone to tell me off once in a while to keep me in check. We can get carried away with things and friends are there to stop us from making a fool out of ourselves. Euripides, considered to be one of the last tragedy writer of classical Athens, writing over 90 plays in his right, said 'One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives'. I love this. It's not that I don't cherish my relatives. I have many cousins who have come to my aid in my time of need and I appreciate them and hold them dear to my heart always. They are cousins, blood is thicker than water and that's why we stand up for each other during tough times. But unfortunately, for every 2 cousins who were there for me, there were 10 more relatives who were not supportive. This is a big ratio. For each 10 relatives who were unsupportive, I have one friend who were be so dear to me that I am overwhelmed with their kindness which never wavered even when the bad times are seemingly over and I'm back on my toes. My hats off to them. I will never forget them and their kindness. These are people who are not blood related but yet, they are able to look pass all that, to lend a hand or give me a shoulder to cry on. I love all my friends. Sometimes it is difficult to hear something you might not want to hear from a close friend, but that's what they are there for, to keep us grounded, to keep us on our toes. As we grow older or move forward, we should be around people we love and who treat us like a member of their family. It's the ultimate recognition and acceptance you'll find in your quest for friendship.